When I was a child, time seemed to drag. I was desperate to be older and birthdays were a thrill. The lazy days of summer were a time to explore the neighbourhood and my own abilities. Swimming and tennis lessons, cycling, dance classes, road hockey, playing tag from morning until night. By the time school started, I was sick of the time off and desperate to get back into the classroom.

I remember university much in the same manner. Time passed slowly, as if I were running through puddles of glue.

Somewhere along the way – early to mid 20’s I expect – time seemed to start whizzing by. I’m sure it coincides with leaving academics to work full-time. Blink and your next birthday was around the corner. Sneeze and you missed an important moment in a loved one’s life. Before I knew it I was celebrating my 5 year anniversary. Next time I looked up from the grindstone it was anniversary number 9. We slid into our 30’s barely remembering where the time went. It seems like only days ago that I boarded a plane to Manila but months have passed.

Dad died a month ago today. Bits and pieces of my life are starting to slot back into place. I’m back at work and starting to socialize with friends again. The hubby and I are starting to slide into old and familiar routines. Soon it will be Christmas. The pain is as fresh as it was in the beginning. Time continues to rush past but I’m learning that you can’t rush grieving and healing.

I miss my dad.

Technorati Tags: ime, death, grief, childhood, healing

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